One small Valentine's Day massacre

I was cold-called by a computer software salesman on Friday morning.

Standard salesman practice dictates that, in the first instance, you should engage the potential customer in trivial anodyne conversation, thereby ensuring some form of engagement, before moving on to the business in hand, often referred to as 'the kill'. This salesman's opening gambit was along the lines of 'Doing anything nice for Valentine's Day?' That gave me the best belly laugh I've had this year.

The salesman, let's call him John, even though his real name was Pete, started to swap Valentine's Day notes with me, you know, the sort of you-can't-do-right-for-doing-wrong stuff; of course, I could only empathise. John told me that as he was about to walk out of the house yesterday morning, he heard his partner's voice coming from the bathroom - 'Think on!' she had cried. Just that and nothing else. Think on? What's that supposed to mean? You're immediately transported to that awkward bloke sort of situation from which there's no escape. You want to do the right thing but you're doomed; you may have had your own ideas but all of a sudden you're riddled with doubt - you don't know what to do for the best.

This year, unusually, I was ahead of myself and had managed to procure a reasonable card and thought of a gift all on my own for the first time in over twenty years. So, feeling confident, whilst supping a glass of wine on the Friday evening I told Mrs Tips the salesman story. Next day in town Mrs T spots something, comes up to me and says in that knowing way of hers... 'Think on!'

Needless to say, I did 'a Denman' and messed up, big time. And as if all that wasn't bad enough, Mrs T had told me on Saturday morning that Tricky Trickster was gong to win the Aon 'because it's a good name and I like Ruby Walsh'.

Still, it's a bit too early to totally write off Denman just yet...

Weekend notes

Big Zeb bounced back to form to take the Tied Cottage Chase at Punchestown earlier today; the trainer feels he has now sorted a problem the horse had with ringbone on his off-fore. This evening Ladbrokes bet 7/1 Colm Murphy's charge for the Champion Chase.

The abandonment of Doncaster yesterday meant that Nicky Henderson's Mad Max missed his intended engagement while Henrietta Knight's Somersby is likely to be re-routed to Doncaster next Saturday after Hereford was called off earlier today. One name missing from the list of runners in Saturday's Cleeve Hurdle was Karabak - Alan King's charge scoped dirty and as a result was kept at home in his box.

Paul Nicholls rightly took the plaudits for bringing Taranis back from a long layoff to win the Argento Chase at Cheltenham on Saturday. However, over the past couple of days a number of his more fancied chances have failed to deliver - both Tataniano (2/11f) and Aiteen Thirtythree (7/4f) were turned over at Newbury on Friday while Pistolet Noir (8/15f) and Royal Charm (5/4f) disappointed at the Festival Trials Day.

Well done to fellow blogger Ben Aitken whose book 'Narrowing The Field: Using The Dosage Method to Win at National Hunt Racing' received a favourable review in the Racing Post before Christmas but reached another level with a review in last Sunday's Observer. Perhaps now is the time to invest in a copy with just six short weeks before the Cheltenham Festival.

Tennis correspondent Mrs Tips' verdict on the Australian men's final: Federer awesome, Murray work in progress.

One footballing item - a Lee Dixon comment overheard in today's radio coverage of the Arsenal v. Manchester United game: 'It's hard enough staying on your feet when you're playing against Rooney, but if you're going to fall over, you're giving yourself a mountain to climb.' I'm not certain I know what he was trying to say there...

Finally a recent tweet from @Huntingdonraces suggested we ditch flowers and chocs for Valentine's Day and take a loved one racing instead. I tried that before but Mrs Tips was singularly unimpressed. Here's an alternative suggestion - ditch the loved one for the afternoon and go racing on your own - much more fun!

The week in focus

Paul Nicholls was surprisingly upbeat about Denman on Saturday's Morning Line. To my mind the trainer appeared to hint that, with hindsight, he may have sent his charge to Kempton a little undercooked. It's too early to write 'the tank' off just yet but bookmakers aren't taking any chances by offering just 5/1 last season's Gold Cup winner can repeat the trick next month.

As Tom Scudamore passed the winning post on Madison Du Berlais at Kempton, he beckoned to his rivals (in particular Ruby Walsh on Denman) to try and keep up. A week later and another big chase, this time at Ascot, but there was no waving from Tom this time around - he was too busy pushing and shoving on Tamarinbleu who was left for dead by Voy Por Ustedes' classy display.

My advice to rookie paddock watchers, particularly when the going is on the soft side, is to look for the biggest horse in the field and bet it. In future similar advice offered to Eurostar passengers entering the country means they'll probably chance upon Mark Wallinger's sculpture, 'the Angel of the South'. The work is to be modelled on his own stallion, a grey called Riviera Red, but will be thirty three times bigger. Riviera Red won a Class 7 Classified Stakes at Lingfield on Tuesday.

With the Festival just around the corner, you may be interested to learn that The Raceform Update Cheltenham Guide 2009 will be available (from all good newsagents) on Friday 27th February, priced very reasonably at £2.99. Now, I really must go and order my tickets for Champion Chase Day...

Valentine's Day falling on a Saturday often leads to disagreements in the Tips' household. I know I'm the wrong side of twenty seven, but Mrs Tips is still not amused when I suggest a trip to the races as 'something affectionate we can do together' on the special day. Originally hailing from Wrexham, it appears I'm not the only one who lacks something in the romance department. This year Arriva Wales put on a 'love bus' in the area in an attempt to encourage romantics to hop on and 'pop the question' . There were no takers. My guess is the locals know full well that getting hitched is going to cost them a little bit more than a day return to Llangollen.

Trials' verdict and other matters

While Jeremy Paxman concerns himself with trials of Marks & Spencer's underpants, the rest of us are more concerned with the results of yesterday's trials at Cheltenham. Inglis Drever's victory marks him out as potential banker material for the Festival. Franchoek (4/1) rightly heads the Triumph market and you'd assume there was more to come from Aigle D'or. Maljimar won impressively but both Patman Du Charmil and Nacarat went hell for leather up front and that looked to set the race up for something coming from behind. It's academic in any case as trainer Nick Williams has said he intends to send Maljimar to Newbury on March 1st.

On Friday Kieren Fallon was banned from riding worldwide for a period of eighteen months. His split with Coolmore was announced quickly afterwards. Fallon has lodged an appeal, publicly stating that this is not the end of his career and that he will return to race-riding.

It's somewhat ironic that a guy called Ben Gallop should have to explain the BBC's decision to withdraw several aspects of its Ceefax racing service. Over the past few months I've manged to steadily wean myself off - I think I can live without it now.

I'm acutely aware of the dearth of winners provided by this blog over the past few weeks. In a desperate attempt to address this troublesome situation I shall be watching a programme entitled 'Derren Brown: The System' which Channel Four is broadcasting this coming Friday, February 1st, at 9.00 pm. Quoting from the TV schedule in front of me: '"Is it possible," wonders Brown, "to predict every time which horse will win?"' If it is, I'll pass on the details here.

Finally, I'd hardly describe myself as the most romatic of souls but, with Valentine's Day just around the corner, the Weekender's recent offer of 15 words for a tenner looked tempting. I mulled it over but reasoned that Mrs Tips never reads the Weekender anyway, so I stuffed the money on Blazing Bailey at Cheltenham yesterday. Some you win and...