Wednesday, August 05, 2009

John Parrott and the infernal pub quiz machine

Last week I had to stay over in Cardiff one night with a couple of work colleauges; before our evening meal we decided to sample the local Brains' beer. The hostelry chosen was somewhat bereft of other customers with the result that the pub quiz machine in the corner proved just too much of a temptation. I should point out that my visits to public houses have been drastically reduced since the day I got married twenty two years ago; these days I frequent such establishments so infrequently, I can't remember how they work and have to be reminded to go up to the bar and pay for drinks. It follows, therefore, that I have no previous experience of the pub quiz machine. Having said that, my younger colleagues have had some experience with this type of equipment, so we decided to play.

Very quickly I detected a pattern emerging. Each game cost £1, we were asked ridiculously easy questions to start but as soon as we had the chance of merely winning our stake back we were asked ridiculously difficult questions with the result that we didn't win any money at all. This cycle generally took no more than four minutes to complete and, to me, became somewhat disheartening.

Having shoved at least ten of our one pound coins into this infernal machine, we decided to cut our losses and play just a couple more games of 'John Parrott's Sports Quiz'. True to form, John asked us really easy questions at the beginning, giving us the big thumbs up and words of encouragement when we correctly answered the sort of question to which my mother would have known the answer. Then came the obscure question, we guessed wrong and lost our money.

John encouraged us to have another go and, like mugs, we did. This time we were doing quite well and were on the verge of collecting £1.50 when this horse racing question came up...

What type of horse racing takes place at Epsom Downs?

A. Flat
B. Jumping
C. Both Flat & Jumping

I was confident we could collect on this; 'It's A!' I cried.

We selected answer A and, bless my old boots, a big fat red cross came up on screen telling us that was the wrong answer. John Parrott chipped in with a sympathetic 'Hard luck!' and we just stood there, dumbstruck.

John Parrott, sir - I shall never trust you again.


Anonymous said...

Mr Tips, wasting your money on such nonsense. I shall expect extra house keeping money this week and next for that!

Mrs T

Mark said...